i love this boy. i love him, i hope he loves me too.
Sabtu, 17 Maret 2012
The Boy
i saw my boyfriend's direct message on twitter. he used to have a prettier crush than me. he managed to sent messages to this girl 4 days after he sent me blackberry messenger. and now i am afraid, what if. what if we break up, will he chase after me?
i don't think so. there are billion girls better than i am, but only one in almost 7 billion loves him the way he is. i don't need to answer, he must know. i saw my boyfriend pranked my friend. i don't know whether he likes her or not.
he often look at me in the eye, but that was just.. sometimes. not too often now. i want to have him back, all mine. please dear God, i believe faith is with us. i believe you can choose him the best girl, woman to be with. it doesn't matter if i don't belong with him, but please find someone to look after him better than i did.
i am not perfect but i want to love him perfectly. i don't need to be given flowers or tons of chocolates, i just need a thing that its presence is unknown in biology, can not be described by chemistry, or even be solved by math. his love, inside the anonymous heaven-ish beautiful gorgeous dazzling place, named heart.
i remember the date 5 june, when he touched me in the heart, unlock its key, and take the love away with him. and now i see guys just like friends, except for him.
do you guys want to know the truth? he is not handsome, he doesn't have porsche or even white horse, he can't beat dragons, but he beat me. he bit every single piece of me. i just want to see him laughing and smiling as bright as the sun that shine beneath his black-as-ebony hair.
his smile is gorgeous in my eyes. i am all his. i hope he is all mine, too. i hope i am his best girl that he would ever have. i don't want to start all over, restarts are for cowards. i want to live my life, with him. we must learn from our mistakes in the past. i want to live in a better world with you. please take me if you will. i am waiting for your love to come to me.
but when i type these words on the keyboard, i can't stop. this is just nice, to show what i am feeling now. thanks, diary.
Sincerely,
anonymous
i don't think so. there are billion girls better than i am, but only one in almost 7 billion loves him the way he is. i don't need to answer, he must know. i saw my boyfriend pranked my friend. i don't know whether he likes her or not.
he often look at me in the eye, but that was just.. sometimes. not too often now. i want to have him back, all mine. please dear God, i believe faith is with us. i believe you can choose him the best girl, woman to be with. it doesn't matter if i don't belong with him, but please find someone to look after him better than i did.
i am not perfect but i want to love him perfectly. i don't need to be given flowers or tons of chocolates, i just need a thing that its presence is unknown in biology, can not be described by chemistry, or even be solved by math. his love, inside the anonymous heaven-ish beautiful gorgeous dazzling place, named heart.
i remember the date 5 june, when he touched me in the heart, unlock its key, and take the love away with him. and now i see guys just like friends, except for him.
do you guys want to know the truth? he is not handsome, he doesn't have porsche or even white horse, he can't beat dragons, but he beat me. he bit every single piece of me. i just want to see him laughing and smiling as bright as the sun that shine beneath his black-as-ebony hair.
his smile is gorgeous in my eyes. i am all his. i hope he is all mine, too. i hope i am his best girl that he would ever have. i don't want to start all over, restarts are for cowards. i want to live my life, with him. we must learn from our mistakes in the past. i want to live in a better world with you. please take me if you will. i am waiting for your love to come to me.
but when i type these words on the keyboard, i can't stop. this is just nice, to show what i am feeling now. thanks, diary.
Sincerely,
anonymous
Rabu, 14 Maret 2012
You are now my official diary
since i can't tell anybody in this whole wide world, i will promote you to be my official diary.
sometimes (you really have to know that..) heart is sick of hiding problems unsolved. sometimes it doesn't have to be solved, but at least people know what you think and what you feel right now. and i chose my boyfriend instead of my best friends, because sometimes they didn't have much time or didn't even want to listen to my stories. but my boyfriend got tired of me too, literally, he is sick of me, i think.
he said that he didn't love me as much as he loved me like 7 months ago. like the first time he texted me, or called me. i want that love to grow back, so i asked him a second chance before we ended up like strangers the day after he asked me to break up. he gave it, and i used it well. he said that his love is growing fast, but it's not perfect yet. i have to wait.
he is sick, Salmonella typhii infected him perhaps so he caught fever, headache, stomachache and other complications which i don't even know, because he didn't tell me, so i asked his roommates. every single day, or even hours and they got sick of meeting me, or even when my mouth haven't opened yet, they already know what i am going to ask them.
thanks to them, i can tell everything to his mother, she worried about his son so much, even i got confused, "why doesn't she come here?" but i have to understand her business too, and this is also my responsibility of being a girlfriend, and i am honored and happy to do that. that's fine, because i love him, and he doesn't have to know about this.
every time my school mates saw me, they always say, "what the hell's going on with you? you looked like a lonely sardine in the cool box." and once i said, "thanks, i don't think there are lots of fish in the sea, because i'm in the cool box." and then they bullied me.
things changed when he didn't there for me. i felt lonely, sad, and much more i don't even know what's that feeling in english. or maybe it's called hypophrenia, the feelings (sadness) come without any reasonable reason. i learned and pass through my german exam, the mid term exams, sometimes with no passion at all.
what i need is you recovering fast, so that i can see your laugh, smile, or even anger soon. i want to get all the happy memories back. i love you, Andika!
oh my! i almost forgot! thanks for being my official diary, blog!
sincerely,
a Hypophrenian
sometimes (you really have to know that..) heart is sick of hiding problems unsolved. sometimes it doesn't have to be solved, but at least people know what you think and what you feel right now. and i chose my boyfriend instead of my best friends, because sometimes they didn't have much time or didn't even want to listen to my stories. but my boyfriend got tired of me too, literally, he is sick of me, i think.
he said that he didn't love me as much as he loved me like 7 months ago. like the first time he texted me, or called me. i want that love to grow back, so i asked him a second chance before we ended up like strangers the day after he asked me to break up. he gave it, and i used it well. he said that his love is growing fast, but it's not perfect yet. i have to wait.
he is sick, Salmonella typhii infected him perhaps so he caught fever, headache, stomachache and other complications which i don't even know, because he didn't tell me, so i asked his roommates. every single day, or even hours and they got sick of meeting me, or even when my mouth haven't opened yet, they already know what i am going to ask them.
thanks to them, i can tell everything to his mother, she worried about his son so much, even i got confused, "why doesn't she come here?" but i have to understand her business too, and this is also my responsibility of being a girlfriend, and i am honored and happy to do that. that's fine, because i love him, and he doesn't have to know about this.
every time my school mates saw me, they always say, "what the hell's going on with you? you looked like a lonely sardine in the cool box." and once i said, "thanks, i don't think there are lots of fish in the sea, because i'm in the cool box." and then they bullied me.
things changed when he didn't there for me. i felt lonely, sad, and much more i don't even know what's that feeling in english. or maybe it's called hypophrenia, the feelings (sadness) come without any reasonable reason. i learned and pass through my german exam, the mid term exams, sometimes with no passion at all.
what i need is you recovering fast, so that i can see your laugh, smile, or even anger soon. i want to get all the happy memories back. i love you, Andika!
oh my! i almost forgot! thanks for being my official diary, blog!
sincerely,
a Hypophrenian
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